Yikes. It has been a long minute since I have enjoyed a cold Sunday morning with a cup of coffee and a keyboard. That is unfair to me and also unfair to my few readers who come to read these jumbled thoughts.
I spoke about my dealings with anxiety in the last few posts here. What I had been going through, my darker thoughts, and the ways I had been dealing with them. Obviously, the battle with something like anxiety or any other mental health issue does not just magically disappear just because you talk about (crazy, huh). While, I am still battling these demons every day, I think it is important to let people know that it isn’t always bad. With demons a person can create beauty.
Lately, I have started digging deeper into my hobbies. Going so far to thinking that maybe I could earn a little pocket change. I have been creating and I honestly think it has been the best thing for me. Not only have I been painting, I have tried different mediums: acrylic, oil, watercolor, and ink. I have to say that oil is definitely not my favorite, but I will not be giving up on it just yet. Watercolor is my favorite by far in the painting genre. However, sketching with a black pen is the most therapeutic to me. I love creating those dark lines that are irreversible, permanent.
Thus, I thought I would showcase a little of my art here, maybe get some feedback, and I would be very much interested to know how to take it further if anyone has any experience with art! What’s my next step? I have no idea. I only know that it is about consistency, hard work, and not giving up. I love creating new things, so I’m going to continue to do so.
I guess I will start how I started with my paintings, an acrylic showcase:
Yes, I started my painting adventure like so many others, following a Bob Ross instructional video. It was just a fun thing me and my friends decided to do and it is one of the best decisions I think that we have made so far. It has opened so many doors, so many ideas, and so much support from each other to continue doing what we are doing. Even Bob is not perfect – in fact, he will infuriate you because he won’t tell you a vital thing he did until the END of a painting, but it’s a good start. I do recommend, if you haven’t attempted a Bob Ross, pull out a canvas and try it!
Again, I started small. These are tiny, baby canvases and looking back, I’m actually impressed I could create art on something so tiny.
This desert scene was the first big canvas that I attempted. It is on a huge canvas compared to anything I had done up to this point – before I had just used those tiny canvases. I went big and honestly, I don’t have much regret on it.
This one is one of my favorite pieces I have done so far. It is more reflected of my style. It is very calming to me. This piece is where I realized I could escape those mental demons by putting a few of them down on each painting. Whether that be in beauty or in chaos, it is up to the viewer to decide.
Here, I really was just messing with my aesthetic. I truly love grays, blacks and whites. Manipulating them to create swirls of darkness that are pleasing to the eye. I also was learning how to manipulate my grass, my lines, and also my sponge mixed with leaves to create flow in the tree. Bear with me, again, I am a new artist (if you would even call me that). I took art in high school along with everyone else, but that is the basis of my knowledge. The rest… Is just dumb luck – for lack of a better word.
While, this one is not my favorite by any means, I can appreciate it still. I was getting a little bolder here with my use of colors. I was pushing for more of an abstract look – I think it turned out okay.
You’re right. This is one of my favorites. How could it not be? This one I actually did as a birthday present for my cousin. She loves horses, she has horses, and I was feeling up to the challenge of making her something she could keep forever. Let me reiterate, that I was up to the challenge, but by no means did I think I could create something that looked so good such as this. I am honestly so proud of this piece and I only wish that I could replicate it again. I am always going to be looking forward to pushing myself to do more pieces like this in the future.
Now, I know she isn’t perfect. However, if you have ever attempted to draw your own animals – holy crap – it is difficult. You think you know their face, their reactions, and their little quirks that make them who they are. Putting that on a canvas is completely different. It was difficult and I do not hate it, I think with practice I can get better at doing more dog portraits!
Well, that was more or less my collection of acrylic paintings I have completed up to date. I only have one oil painting in my collection:
This was the most difficult painting I have done thus far. I am not even going to sugar coat it. I did not have a good time, but I was determined to complete it. I used new techniques I never had used before such as the utilization of painting knives to “cut” the paint. I had to try to wrap my head around paint thinner – which at the time I did not realize I could purchase “odorless”. To be honest, by the end of this layered, oil mess – I honestly thought I understood why Van Gogh took his ear off: Pure frustration (I jest, I have great respect for that man). While this painting did shake my curiosity of attempting oil again, I will attempt it again in the future when I have a better set up of a place to create my art.
On to watercolors! I have only recently picked up watercolor as of last week, but I have had a blast up to this point playing with it. The works that I have completed I love and I am going to create more.
This one was never suppose to be a complete painting. The night that I did this, I just got out the watercolor paints thinking I would mess around with them, push and pull the colors around the paper to see how it flows, and probably end up with a mess. However, a painting was created and I am very proud. Again, it isn’t perfect, but I am slowly learning that art never is and that is the beauty of it.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am a huge fan of Hayao Miyazaki. He is the creator of amazing films such as “Spirited Away”, “Howl’s Moving Castle”, and “My Neighbor Totoro”. If ever I had art goals, it would be to create characters with the love and devotion that he has in creating his art. They are unique, one of a kind, Japanese-cultured, and up to interpretation. I only hope I transfer his likings to my pieces.
These two watercolors are the only ones so far that I have done, but again, I have enjoyed playing with watercolor so much. I am still learning, but it is so much fun! I’m going to continue to say that I highly recommend it if you are looking for a hobby to do all the time or even just in your down time.
In between the acrylic and the watercolor paintings, I have found myself sketching more often. I have ink pens that I have to say are addicting to write or draw with. We are coming to the end of my portfolio (if one would call it that) but I am still creating. So, without further ado, here are my pen sketches:
This one was just a bed-time, messing around with my pen sketch. I don’t have that much to say about it simply because it is what it is. I have not actually put pencil/pen to paper in probably 4 years, so bear with me, I am very inexperienced.
So here is a fun one. Again, I don’t know if anyone reading this is as geeky as I am, but I love video games. That means about all video games out there – RPGs, casual games, MMOs, and yeah, even the occasionally first person shooter. Five Night’s at Freddy’s has a place in every gamers heart whether that be hatred, curiosity, or love. I have to say that I love it. I love the lore, I love that people can get into the horror genre in such a way, and I love watching my favorite YouTuber’s play it. This was my sketch in respect of the VR game that just came out. I actually really enjoy this piece. It is unfinished as I do have to paint his present box that he is coming out of.
There is my art journey laid out in a perfect straight line, all the way down to my feelings behind each piece. I am having a blast doing this. I do have one more piece that I did not put up with the acrylic pieces as it is the newest that I have done. So I guess I will leave the post on that note. Here is my latest canvas piece: